So Called Coping

I am not ashamed

But I bite my tongue

Until all I remember is the copper tang

I am not a liar

But I do not speak the full truth

Until guilt bangs on my heart

It’s complicated

I am not ashamed

Of a tragedy from long ago

But I cannot deny it

As it defines part of me

It is not an excuse

Or crutch or attention seeking

My tears are real

Just as they are silent

I am not ashamed

But it’s complicated

-Kel Dayheart